Someone at work has been trying to have conversations with me. I only just realized it today when she asked, as she tends to, 'Have you seen any of the Jurassic Park movies?' To which I naturally answered 'No.' I don't watch movies, and never American blockbusters. (Too loud and too violent for my quivering sensibilities.) Then it occurred to me that this was a lead-in. 'Did you go see the latest one?' And she had, and would have liked to talk about it with me if I'd seen it too. But I hadn't, and this is why no one can have a conversation with me.

Well, not no one, obviously. But I can't join in conversations that revolve around movies, TV shows, and music. And I can't talk at work anyway, because my eye and attention is always on the kids. (Of course I think other people's attention should be there too, an attitude I've had a hard time getting over.)

But mostly there's those four rules of proportionate response: is it kind? is it necessary? is it true? and above all, does it improve on the silence? And of course, by me very little improves on silence.